Fears, Thoughts, Beliefs
When we have some fear, it seems to the person having that fear, that the fear makes sense. If you have a fear, it would seem that fear is real and is valid. But often -- if not most of the time --...
View ArticleYour Heaven on Earth
It is so easy to get pulled into threats and dangers, mishaps and mistakes. It is wired into our brain to have a focus on the negative. Which is too bad. That means we are more likely to miss the...
View ArticleHow to Be FREE
One day, I was watching some videos (you know how that rabbit hole works) that led me to a video on this interesting sport. I love water sports, and am frequently daydreaming this time of year about...
View ArticleWhat A Year!
What a year! It was one year ago this week that I was on my last business trip. I was at an event with my publisher. Already, we knew COVID was out, and knew it was gaining steam. Other countries...
View Article5 Lessons from 55 Trips Around the Sun
Another year has passed. I added a year to when I answer, "How old are you?" Well, at least in theory. I am an unreliable narrator for reporting my age. By accident. But on a repeated basis. That...
View ArticleFrom “If” to “Is”
At the beginning of my career, I was a hospital chaplain. One of my tasks was to help people accept what was going on... to accept the diagnosis, the outcome of an accident or tragedy, to accept the...
View ArticleHow to Break Out of a Rut
We all have times in life where we just feel... stuck... in a rut. Life on repeat. Another day, another week, another month, another year clicks by, same ol' same ol'. That is the definition of a...
View ArticleClean and Dirty Pain
Anyone who tells you that you can go through life without getting hurt and feeling pain is either lying or hiding. Life is rough-and-tumble. Pain is unavoidable. But there is a type of pain that we...
View ArticleGrowth Mindset In The Pandemic
2020. ¯\_(?)_/¯ Am I right? And we just keep stretching on into 2021. The pandemic isn't over, the virus isn't gone. And here we still are. Thriving? Stuck? Research psychologist, Carol Dweck,...
View ArticleDoes Everything Happen for a Reason?
In recent days, I have been with people in the middle of horrific losses. Inevitably, someone steps up and in an attempt to comfort, says, "Everything happens for a reason." That comment is rarely...
View ArticleWhen Life Knocks You Down
Life has a way of knocking us down. Every single person. Life hits hard sometimes, and softer sometimes. But life will knock us down. Not once. Not twice. But many times. Many people get stuck...
View ArticleDo You Believe Your Thoughts?
Those thoughts, they get us into trouble, don't they? We keep looking for that thing that will make us happy. We think we know. We think that thing, that person, that place, that paycheck, position,...
View ArticleThe 4 “Can’ts”
"You can't. . . ." "I can't. . . ." That pretty much ends the conversation. Which is unfortunate. History is littered with people doing the very things someone else said, "You can't do that." Turns...
View ArticleHow to Forgive Yourself
Forgiving is an important skill. When we forgive people for hurts and slights in the past, we get to free ourselves from those events. (That skill is so important that I wrote a book about the process...
View ArticleThe SSC Strategy for Changing Your Life
Have you heard of Kaizen? It is the principle of continuous improvement. Continuous improvement is a great model for change. It is based on constant changes toward a better outcome. No need for...
View ArticleDeparture Conversations
So far, life has a 100% mortality rate. We are not getting out of this alive! You and I, and everyone we know, will face the inevitable moment of losing loved ones, and facing our own death. And yet,...
View ArticleNot Winning or Losing, But Learning or Learning
I don't know about you, but I was raised around competition. Not so much from my parents, but from culture. In school, you compete in all sorts of tasks... trying to prove how smart, how good, how...
View ArticleAfter the Apology
You apologize. Now what? Are you finished? Is it now up to the person to whom you apologized? Nope. That is only one part of the process. Understand that apologies, forgiving, reconciliation, and...
View ArticleWhat’s Your Challenge??
Are you up for a challenge? In the last episode of my podcast, I discussed how to hold on when life is tough. That's when life is challenging you. But what about when life isn't so challenging......
View ArticleResponsibility vs. Blame
Blame is rampant in today's world. We all quickly point the finger at someone/something else, proclaiming, "It's not my fault!" Interestingly, I also notice how rampant it is for people to take the...
View ArticleDealing with Criticism
I don't know anyone who really likes criticism. Well, at least receiving criticism. I do know some people who seem to relish dishing out criticism! You probably know some, too. But criticism can be...
View ArticleChange in the Shadow of Terror
Sometimes, success comes from being at the right place at the right time. Sometimes, tragedy comes from being at the wrong place at the wrong time. But what happens when you are at the right place at...
View ArticleNo-Bull Ways To Change Your Life
My coaching client was wanting to thrive. He told me he was constantly studying about self-growth. But he wanted to really transform his life. And, he told me, so much of what he was reading was, to...
View ArticleHow Fear Keeps You Stuck
It seems to be a specialty of mine... getting people UN-stuck. Which means I spend a fair amount of time noting what gets people stuck in the first place. Makes sense, right? If you want to get...
View ArticleFinding Self-Confidence
We all want confidence -- SELF-confidence. We want to be confident before we act. In other words, I want to feel confident of myself before I move toward something. Or maybe that's just me! :-) But...
View ArticleAre Mis-Wants Keeping You Stuck?
Have you ever wanted something... just knowing that if you had it, you would be... happy? And if you got it, did you find yourself happier? Not just for a few moments or days, but long-term?...
View ArticleEgo Trips
A couple of episodes back, I discussed some lessons I have learned in my less-than-half a year in jiu jitsu. One of my lessons was about "egoless learning." Several people asked what I meant by my ego...
View ArticleBroken??
Have you seen this picture in your FB feed or on Twitter? It crossed my path a number of times. The first time I saw it, I was immediately uncomfortable. But it took a little time for me to be clear...
View ArticleCorrecting Course
"How did I end up here?," my client asked. He told me that for so long, he thought he was headed in the right direction. Now, he thinks maybe it was the entirely wrong direction. I asked him, "Did...
View ArticleDoes Gratitude Matter?
If you are in the States, we are on the cusp of the Holiday season, kicking off with Thanksgiving in just a few days. For me, the Holidays throughout the year are moments to step into gratitude. Not...
View ArticleWhat Is Stress?
I bet you hear it as much as I do. You may even say it. "I'm so stressed!" The malady of the modern age. Stressed out, exhausted, and frustrated. But what IS stress? As much as we toss that term...
View ArticleStuck in When/Then?
It's a trap. And we all fall into it. Sadly, we set it up on ourselves, then step right into it. WHACK! We are stuck... waiting. And that's the trap -- the wait. Life can't begin until.... What's...
View ArticleRedux: Merry Stressness!
And just like that, the Holiday season is upon us! All the hustle and bustle. All the events. All the demands… in the midst of a time that you want to be enjoyable, meaningful, and manageable! Why the...
View ArticleIt’s A Challenge!
Life is a challenge, isn’t it? I don’t think I am saying anything that is a surprise these days. We’ve been dealing with a pandemic now for over 2 years. For many people, that has led to many...
View ArticleControlling What You Can
Many people make the Control Error — they attempt to control what they cannot control, while also failing to control what they can. Why? Because they don’t know what they can’t control and they don’t...
View ArticleCommunity and Connection
It’s in our DNA. We have a need to connect with others, to have connections and relationships. We express that in close relationships and larger groups. And unfortunately, lately, we have often...
View ArticleContribution
When I talk about Thriveology, many people say, “Oh, that is more of that ‘being happy’ stuff, isn’t it?" My response: No. Well, not just that. Sure, being happy is fine. No need to avoid being...
View ArticleCreate!
I must admit, I have said it myself, “I am just not creative.” But that isn’t true. Not for me, and not for you. Perhaps you had some art teacher tell you that at one point. Or perhaps you were looking...
View ArticleBe Curious
As we continue exploring your thrive code, the next topic is… are you curious? OK, that is actually the topic: being curious. I’ve come to regard curiosity as one of the main paths to thriving. In...
View ArticleSeek Clarity
Did you ever have one of those Magic 8-Balls when you were growing up? I never had one, but a friend down the street did. You were supposed to ask Yes/No questions of the ball, then turn it over and...
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Finding Compassion
Over the past 7 episodes, we have been building our Thrive Code. The code to follow that allows us to thrive, and also the code that runs your system, like computer code. And we are closing in on the...
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Calm in Crazy Times
Have you seen the meme that caught my eye?: I really wish I weren’t living through a major historical event right now! I feel that! But here is the thing I am realizing — historic events are happening...
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The Forgive Habit
A few weeks ago, a coaching client noted her resistance to forgiving for fear that she would be vulnerable to being hurt. I told her that was not at all true. In fact, being alive leaves you open to...
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How Do Others Treat You?
“Why don’t they treat me the way I want to be treated?”, my client asked me. So, I asked, “Have you taught them how to treat you?” The silence let me know. But after a pause, my client said, “I guess...
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Start Here
“Where should I start?”, my client asked. Lots of times, we want to make changes, we want things to be different. And sometimes, we want things to be different before we make any changes. We want a...
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Change Your Algorithms
All around the news, we are hearing about algorithms built into our social media. It directs what we see and hear. It is how all social media decides what to feed you next. If you like this video,...
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Is Micro-Quitting Keeping You from Thriving?
Do you micro-quit? I sure do. And I need to quit micro-quitting! Maybe you do, too. It undermines my goals (and likely, your goals too). And it keeps you from thriving. What is micro-quitting?...
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Your Me Exception
Do you ever do something that breaks a rule (or even a law), thinking to yourself that it doesn’t apply to you? I do. Sometimes, I use that speed limit sign as a suggestion. I’m a good driver, I tell...
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“Where Have You Been?”
I’ve had a few people who have noticed that the Thriveology Podcast has been on a bit of a hiatus for a couple of months. They asked where I have been. Well, since the question was about my podcast,...
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How to Live a Meaningful Life
Just a little rant here: philosophy classes turn off many college students for a simple reason — they never get around to saying how philosophy can shake your living. Some classes might teach more on...
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